Showing posts with label Living. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Living. Show all posts

Thursday, July 18, 2013

Lost, Waiting to Be Found

I've been doodling quite a lot recently. It helps take my mind off things that are troubling me. I can get sucked into a doodle like the one above and for a little while, all the stresses of life dissipate. 

I can almost forget that I don't have a real full time job in my field after I worked so hard to attain a degree in Fashion Merchandising that is seemingly useless at the moment. I can almost forget that my mother is no longer here to boost my confidence or give me advice or tell me everything will work out eventually. I can almost forget that I'm living at home with my father struggling to make ends meet.

I can almost forget. Almost. 

I may be lost right now but I know I will be metaphorically found someday soon. I know I'm not alone in my struggle to achieve my goals and realize my dreams. With support from my family and friends and with perseverance and determination, I will be found. 

Monday, July 8, 2013

Head Towards the Light...

Flowers grow from darkness underneath the dirt upwards towards the light, and with enough light and water, they bloom. I saw a quote which iterated that more eloquently than I just did, but I've been thinking about it a lot since I came across it. 
Things feel very dark for me right now. I feel as if I'm fighting through the dirt, trying to find my way to the light, trying to overcome the obstacles in front of me, and despite my hard work, years of struggling, and sheer persistence, I am knocked back down below the surface. 
I should probably explain. You see, I came so close to finally having a full-time job, in my field, doing something I'm passionate about, with a company I love, in a city I love, and it fell through my fingers. 
For whatever reason, it just was not meant to be, no matter how much I wanted it, no matter how confident I felt about it, no matter anything, it was not in the cards for me. At least that is what I've been telling myself for the last week when I start feeling that sense of failure that accompanies getting rejected.
Maybe I said something stupid. Maybe my background wasn't exactly what they were looking for. Maybe I wore the wrong outfit. Maybe my handshake sucked. Maybe they hated my voice. 
Maybe's aside, I have to face it-- the job is not mine. That is now the past and my focus is on today and the future. I'm going to keep fighting through the dirt, in the dark, clawing my way to the surface, growing along the way. Someday soon, I will see a glimmer of the proverbial light. I'll get another chance at achieving my goals and realizing my current dreams. I'll get the job that is perfect for me and I will bloom into a beautiful flower, and when I do, I will appreciate it that much more and I will work that much harder. My struggle is not in vain, my skills will not go unused, and my dreams will come true!

Saturday, May 25, 2013

May Daydreams

Summer is kinda almost here. It is Memorial Day weekend after all. Here in Northeast PA, we had a few days of incredible 80 degree weather and then today I woke up to temperatures in the 40s. Mother Nature cannot seem to make up her mind.
Nonetheless, summer plans are underway including a much needed trip down to Philadelphia to visit friends and enjoy all the beautiful things the city has to offer to help kick off the best season of the year.
Until then, here are some of my favorite photos from the last few weeks.
Playing with chalk pastels.


My rhododendrons bloomed!




Northeast PA coal mines



Tuesday, April 2, 2013

April Dreams Bring... ?

We're already a few days into April. Three months of 2013 down.
Whenever a new month begins I always end up thinking about how fast life moves and all of the things I want to accomplish.
I want to expand my garden.
I want to do something with my ridiculously long hair. A new color, a new cut, a new something.
I want to visit Philly. I miss it there.
I want to keep creating. Paint. Draw. Sew.
I want to see Jurassic Park in 3D because well, Jurassic Park is awesome.
I want to accomplish so many things and the days never seem long enough.
There are things I want for myself that seem so unattainable at the moment, like when you wake up from a fantastically real dream and for a few blissful seconds you are still mentally there. It all seems reachable. The dreamy haze wears off though. I realize that I still have yet to make my dreams come true but that's okay. One day my dreams will come true and then I'll have new dreams to work towards.
Until then, I'll keep creating and exploring and trying new things and enjoying the life I have now before change comes knocking at the door.

Sunday, May 20, 2012

And I'm back...

Obviously I'm really on top of maintaining this blog. CoughNOTcough.  My sincerest apologies. Life has been more hectic than expected up here in NEPA.

Anyway, I have been anxious to start my own terrarium after seeing a bazillion of them around the blogosphere. I had a pre-made one a while back but all the cute DIYs (like this one here or that one there) inspired me to create my own. I'm still on the hunt for a perfect glass container for these succulent babies (does that sound dirty to anyone else?). I'll be going on a thrifting adventure this week and I'm optimistic that just the right one is waiting for me to give it a home. So here's a little peek of what's to come when mine is finished.



Wednesday, December 7, 2011

We are the dreamers of dreams...

"We are the music makers,
And we are the dreamers of dreams,
Wandering by lone sea-breakers,
And sitting by desolate streams;--
World-losers and world-forsakers,
On whom the pale moon gleams:
Yet we are the movers and shakers
Of the world for ever, it seems."
-Arthur O'Shaughnessy, 1874